Get out! 7-11 is here. Not the date, silly -the store. Oh yeah, well it’s 7-11 the date too, we guess. Don’t you know what happens every year on this magical date? Thousands of people flock to their local 7-11 stores and celebrate the anniversary of the store chain by filling up on free small Slurpees. Tomorrow is 7-11’s 83rd birthday. That’s right -more than eight decades serving up local fare that’s literally a block away, and serving customers all over the world.
We all grew up with this chain, and we definitely grew up with the Slurpees -my favorites were the Cherry Red and of course, the old standby, the Coke flavored one. Pull back that knob and fill up those cups, but don’t get brain freeze like Bart Simpson did when he went into the Quik-e-Mart, which is “The Simpsons”’s homage to this most venerable of institutions.
Come celebrate this birthday by just walking up to the Slurpee dispenser in the back. The small sizes are gratis, so it’s up to you to decide whether you really want the Big Gulp or Super Big Gulp (yikes!) size. And if it’s sizzling hot where you are this weekend, then nothing really beat this icy concoction. I’m all for the old school flavors; none of the funky blue hues or silly Farmville gimmicks for us, thanks. Go on! Grab some jerky. Get one of those hot dogs that have been rolling around since Thursday. Some Baby Ruths. Nuke a burrito. Sneak a glazed donut. They’re all gonna go well with the Slurpee. And the best part is that it’s absolutely free.
We don’t necessarily suggest you try to enter several times in different disguises, fake porn star mustaches etc., like these idiots try to do, but hey, if you just can’t get enough of them, then you can do just about anything. Also, somehow my 7-11, which is a mere block from me, does not happen to blare Whitney Houston’s “I’m Every Woman” or Madonna’s “Everybody” when I walk in. How very old school.