Smash TV: Big Brother Week 7

Sunday, August 31st, 2008 | SMASH TV with

Big Brother 10

With about three weeks to go before the September 16 finale, BB10 is getting pretty treacherous and, of course, incredibly trashy and filled with drama. This week Dan the devious Catholic high school teacher/football coach was HOH, and he hatched a plan that was designed to solifidy his “Renegade” alliance he has with Memphis. And it worked, although it was weird to see him alternately look terrified but, like a Puppetmaster, tell others what to do during the POV meeting or else risk being put on the block. When Chenbot told the houseguests at the start of Thursday’s live telecast that there would be a double eviction, they were clearly unsettled. This meant that a “fast forward” week would be done in one show, and Chenbot deftly rushed through an HOH competition, another pair put up on the block, a POV event (which we didn’t see), and then another live vote to kick someone off. (Whew! Give Mrs. Les Moonves an Emmy!)  In the end, it was Portuguese Princess Michelle who was initially tossed out, and following her was Ollie, with the backwards cap. Both were ushered out in a dramatic week of deals, silly bets, incredible stupidity and physical rage from a Black man. Let’s back up a bit:

•    Dan was the HOH last week. Inside his skinny body we are supposed to think he is a brainiac. He isn’t. But he has been able to hide that he was America’s Player a few weeks back, doing America’s bidding to off Jessie and collect a cool $20K. He has also been cool under pressure when accused of this and other devious deeds. But he seems meek, even stooping to take off his Jesus cross before he commits something mean, like lying. Hypocrite? Maybe, but he also seems to be the only one on the show right now that steps up and does something. The others merely seem to float right now and not do much. So during last week’s HOH competition, Dan made a deal with Ollie, the last two left hanging on the plastic vine, in a violent swinging event that apparently did not kill Jerry. Dan apparently made a three-part deal: he would put Memphis up for eviction, he would not put Ollie or Michelle up, and if anyone in Dan’s alliance won POV, he had to put up one of his people on the block. Sounded like a weird alliance, but it appears that Dan was never going to go through with it. What is appalling is that Ollie fell for all this, and allowed Dan to win HOH.
•    Dan eventually did put up Memphis and Jerry, so he did manage to fulfill part of his promise to Ollie. Memphis didn’t like being put up on the block and he told Dan this —his Renegade partner—emphatically. Dan tried to reassure him that all would be OK. However, one wonders what would have happened if Memphis hadn’t won the POV and he might have been tossed out. In fact, all who are on Dan’s “side”, including Renny and Keesha, seemed to think Dan was a bit off his rocker for concocting such a flimsy plan. And with Ollie of all people.
•    When POV took place finally, Memphis did win. That meant he would clearly take himself off, leaving Dan to either 1) fulfill his deal with a smiling but nervous Ollie by putting up, ideally, Keesha or 2) tell Ollie he’s a fool for thinking Dan would be stupid enough to give up his power and allow Ollie to dictate what he does. Dan chooses the second option. In a clumsy scheme before the ceremony, he asks everyone who will be voting to participate in a “naming” routine that he calls “Replacement Nominee Roulette”: who would they put up if they were him? By doing this, he wanted to play the others off each other and create some ill will by showing, for example, that Ollie would want Renny off, Renny then utters Ollie’s name, etc. The “roulette” game was “high stakes” in that Mephistopheles Dan demanded compliance: you had to name someone or else you would be put up on the block immediately. It was all rather clumsily executed, and lame, considering that Dan had planned to backdoor Michelle in all along, therefore taking off someone on Ollie’s team and playing Ollie’s fatheaded, mealy-mouthed, backwards-cap-wearing ass for the genuine fool he has been all season long. Man-chelle, needless to say, was livid and when she went to the diary room to deliver her expletive-laden outburst, she claimed to know “exactly” was going on. “Don’t play me like I’m some f****** idiot!” Obviously she did not know and clearly she was an idiot. Michelle was going home.
•    What happened next took some by surprise: Ollie actually grew a pair and began destroying the BB house. He threw things in the house (he smashed a huge lollipop!), and generally went into a Black Man Rage for being “embarrassed in front of millions” and for being emasculated and lied to by Dan. Dan was not going to “give up” his power. Ollie’s anger suddenly unveiled something that we had not seen before in him. Instead of being a mere cipher, sexual organ injector for April and otherwise slouch, his monumental stupidity at being fooled by not-quite-dumb-as-a-rock-but-close Dan actually brought out moments of fury that everyone could see –including on-line viewers, and, from another room, Memphis, Keesha and a probably nervous Dan. Apparently BB (yes, there is male voice in the house that keeps order and gives instructions) warned Ollie that he could be kicked off. He was also told to stay away from Dan –cause you know, he could kill him. Also, there was an online rumor that the knives in the house were removed, lest, well, you know. In any case, here is some of the rage that went down, courtesy of Ollie.

•    Michelle marched into Dan’s HOH room and demanded to know why she was put up. Or as she said “thrown under the bus”. America, please stop using this moronic and trite expression.
•    In the “fast-forward” show that was conducted on Thursday night, Keesha emerged as HOH, which of course only lasted for the length of the broadcast. She naturally put up Ollie and Jerry (again!), since they were the only two left on the other side. We didn’t see the POV competition but we did see an out-of-breath Dan as the winner, and absolutely eager with delight and perhaps some anger that he would announce that he wouldn’t use the POV take anyone off. The live eviction vote happened quickly, and lo and behold, Ollie was tossed out without any goodbyes or hugs. Ollie literally ran out of the house, saying nothing except “good luck”. Chenbot was waiting to interview him before a live audience.
•    Memo to Ollie: you think you will be reunited with April in that jury house (Mexico? The Caribbean? Redondo Beach?), now that you’re out, and that it will be a sex-a-thon once again. I wonder how April feels. April was giving it up in the house because you two were involved in a game. Why would she be doing this now when you both are losers? Just be calm and try to come up with a way to explain your classy existence these past couple of months to your Preacher father and devout Mama when April kicks your triflin’ ass back to Iowa.
•    Jerry Mac Donald, the 75-year old, death watch: Jerry got the “America’s Choice” prize this week by getting a tearful call from home. He just about lost it listening to his grandson and his wife, propped up (she suffers from Parkinson’s) a bit. His wife hinted that she wasn’t too proud of a lot of what she was seeing on TV, but she didn’t elaborate. That makes two of us. In any case, this game is clearly wearing down on him both physically and emotionally.
•    This just in: Jerry is the new HOH this week. Expect more tears and letters from home. No chance, perhaps, that he will lose the red Marines t-shirt he wears every day. And look at this: Jerry has just put up Dan and Keesha for eviction.

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