“Yee haw! Come over here, quick!”
“What is it, Peepaw?”
“Did you see those cute girls on the TV, son? The girl race car drivers? They was over there in Indy on Saturday, practicing for Sunday’s Honda Indy 200. You know, that Danica Patrick girl. And that other one, she’s hot, where-she from? Vene-zu-ay-la? What’s her name? Milk and Donuts, or somethin’ like that?”
“Oh yeah, Gramps, I saw that all right. I guess Danica didn’t like how Milka wasn’t letting her get around her on the racetrack, saying, like, she didn’t like her driving style. Just like a woman, right?”
“Dang nab it, boy, just lookee here at this catfight. Look at them get all hot and bothered, towel slappin like they’s boys in a friggin’ locker room! She is slappin’ that thing in her face. And that mouth on Danica!
“That’s right. She be cussin’ up a storm –thinkin’ she’s like a boy, right? Tryin’ to be all tough too”
“What did I tell you, son? They want to be racin’ cars just like us and look at ‘em, fussin and screaming like angry beavers in front of everybody. That’s just wrong. They should be kicked out of the sport for good.”
“Yeah –look at this website, Peepaw. It’s about that fight too.
They’re blamin’ it on those girls’ time of the month You know –maybe they just can’t help it. We sure don’t have that problem, right? We’re always pissed off! Look –this site has a picture of two hot girls in a jello fight. This one has that picture of these fightin’ pussies.
And hey, this one has a picture of Danica’s bare back in this smokin’ dress. Says Milka Duno is ‘buxom’ –hey, what does that mean, huh?
“Think it means she has a smokin’ rack. Hot damn! Look at Danica in that photo. Like me to get some of that right about now.”
“I’m just sayin. I mean I guess this means we can’t be havin any more girls racin’ cars anymore ‘cause clearly they can’t control their emotions. Can’t they just stay home, have kids and rustle us some supper?
“And have sex with us when we want it?”
“Watch out for that towel, son. They might poke your eye out.”